Skip to main content

Bucket List Redux

It's been sixteen months since I began putting together my bucket list. It's a list that I harbor in the back of my mind, sometimes as a source of inspiration, sometimes as a nagging burden, as I ask myself, "What am I doing today to cross something off my list?"

All too often the answer comes back as, "Nothing." I can't help but feel that I am dawdling, that I've grown complacent in my sense of time and purpose. However, looking back on my list, there are so many things that I have done within the sixteen months since first putting the list together that I never would have thought to put on the list—but in retrospect could have, had I known they were even possible.

I am reminded of Errol Morris' New York Time's column, "The Anosognosic’s Dilemma: Something’s Wrong but You’ll Never Know What It Is," which references Donald Rumsfeld's rather infamous quote from a 2002 NATO press conference, “There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things we now know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. These are the things we do not know we don’t know.” Give Rumsfeld all the grief you will, his statement is factual, astute, and characterized by the type of self-aware honesty that too few of us hold—there are things we know, there are things that we know we don't know, and there are things that are so far outside our frame of reference that we don't even know that we don't know them.

Sixteen months ago, I was a writer who also had an extensive history as a patient. I knew I had some knowledge to share. I knew I wanted to help others navigate the patient experience. I didn't know what an ePatient was, let alone that I was one. I didn't know that there was an entire world of social media dedicated to healthcare. I didn't know that my ideas, my opinions, my words would take me 5,596.5 miles from Palo Alto to Paris, to HealthCamp DC the Kaiser Permanente Center for Total Health in Washington, D.C., to Kansas City, M.O. and Cerner's riverside educational facility for Regina Holliday's Partnership With Patients Summit. I didn't know I would find others who care deeply about talking about advance planning and facing our fears of death with a whole heart and an open heart. I didn't know I would meet people who would be more than mentors—but friends. I didn't know that what would be the most significant part of my life's work had yet to reveal itself.

In retrospect, my bucket list thereby seems naive. What should I make of the fact that I have accomplished so many great things that were not on the list and yet many of things that are on the list still need to be done—while others need be removed for they are no longer something I desire? Indeed the list is of my own creation, and I am the only one to whom I am beholden. Yet I can not help but think that we can not successfully force our hearts to be linear creatures. We must balance that which we (think we) know that we want with that which we do not yet know that we want. We must live with passion and pursue happiness in a way that gives meaning to our life.


The Bucket List Redux

1. Pet a tiger

2. Get more than a magazine article published — preferably a book

3. Write a book

4. Take Travis to London

5. Go horseback riding in Big Sky country

6. Visit Scandinavia — horseback ride through Sweden and Copenhagen, Denmark

7. Visit Athens, Greece

8. Have a ROCKIN’ wedding anniversary/recommitment — 2013

9. Learn to Latin dance — and do it well

10. Learn how to make really awesome Asian dumplings

11. Eat fresh lobster in Maine

12. Effectively tell someone off/stand up for someone in public and in the moment

13. Drive the entire length of the Blue Ridge Parkway

14. Snorkel at Stingray City in Grand Caymans

15. Cruise in and explore the Caribbean — 2013

16. Go to the National Cherry Festival in Traverse City, Michigan (July)

17. Go to Whiting, Indiana’s Pierogi Festival (July) — 2013

18. Have an extreme spa day – 2+ hour massage, mani, pedi, facial, body scrub

19. Pay for something random for a random deserving person

20. Learn to play the hammered dulcimer

21. Wear an expensive beaded dress for a fancy dinner date and evening out

22. Raise awareness of whatever disease I am finally diagnosed with — DONE/DOING

23. Participate in research to help with the diagnosis of my disease — DONE/DOING

24. Help teach other patients to be proactive and involved in their healthcare — DONE/DOING

25. Ensure our financial security by living debt-free and investing well

26. Finish my master’s degree at UNC-Greensboro — DONE

27. STRICKEN FROM LIST

28. Be the subject of/inspiration for a piece of artwork — DONE

29. Landscape the backyard to be more of a place for ourselves and guests to enjoy

30. See the Grand Canyon — DONE

31. Develop a running list of National Parks visited and continue to add to that list including Yosemite, Yellowstone, Bryce Canyon, Zion, Arches

32. See Beck in concert

... more to come!

Comments

  1. Hi, i read this post and found it to be really profound. It is my belief that we can have a broad guide in our lives (goals), and the little pieces (many a times beautiful surprises) will fall into place that we do not expect. You discover more things along the way, and remove things that you no longer one to do.

    I have a dream to help others realize their dreams in my small little way. And I have just completed a dream of mine – an iPhone app (adream) where people can share their dreams and goals in a fun way. If you own an iPhone, hope it helps you get closer to crossing items off your bucket list.

    Best wishes to your bucket list, Ray
    http://twitter.com/raytanys

    adream – http://adre.am/app (iPhone app)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

"We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world." — Buddha

Popular posts from this blog

Access Medicine X: Live Stream Brings Silicon Valley Direct To You

Stanford Medicine X is a catalyst for new ideas, designed to explore social media and information
technology’s power to advance medical practices, improve health, and empower patients to participate in their own care. But Medicine X also seeks to engage and empower those unable to attend in person to still get involved in the discussion.

Through Medicine X’s Global Access program, main stage content from the three-day conference will be made available through a high-quality live stream. Anyone with an Internet connection around the world will be able to view keynote speakers such as Daniel Siegel, MD, clinical professor of psychiatry at University of California-Los Angeles and author of The New York Times bestseller Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain, and panel discussions such as Gonzalo Bacigalupe's focusing on the e-health movement and inequality among marginalized populations.

“Medicine X has distinguished itself through a singular commitment to inclusivit…

Staircase Wit Leaves Us All Cold

Snow had fallen through the night, blanketing the mountains with an inch or more of glistening white. It was the kind of day best spent at home, but an appointment required that I drive to town.

I stopped at a gas station along the way. The station is near the corner of where my parents almost bought a house and not too far from where they actually did. It's open most hours of the night, perhaps even all 24 of the day, and is thus one of my regular stops.

A young man wearing an oversized black jacket and black knit hat pulled tight over his heat was standing directly inside the store's double doors, talking on his cell phone, as a middle-aged, female attendant mopped up melted snow from entryway. I grabbed some Reese's Cups and went to the counter to pay.

The attendant put her mop and bucket away, came to the register, opened the drawer, and began to count her cash. There wasn't much there—a twenty or two and a dozen one dollar bills for which she ran a receipt that she…

Crowdfunding Creativity

For as involved as I am in the national (and, at times, international) healthcare social media community, I find myself in a local void. The mountains I call home are not the epicenter of anything to do with healthcare or social media much less the two together. I've been chipping away, trying to carve out a foothold such that the wealth of education and opportunity found in healthcare and social media can enrich the lives of those I routinely connect with in real life as it has my own. It's slow going. Every fear, every socio-economic force that pushes back against the #hcsm tide can be found here. But today... today made a new friend.

As like minds are prone to do, @SociallyMD and I connected first via Twitter. Lo and behold — we live a mere 20 minutes apart. Prior to departing for Stanford's Medicine X conference, I suggested that since we were the only two Tweeps occupying the local #hcsm space, @SociallyMD and I should meet. And meet we did, instantly connecting profe…